"Macho Bullshit Time Again"

[morrigan-shadow.livejournal.com]

Title:  "Macho Bullshit Time Again"
Rating:  R  
Word Count:  299 
Pairing:  Ace/Sanji
Topic:  Topping
Warnings:  Boy touching, naughty language, and a truly heinous punchline.
Summary:  Ace and Sanji have an issue over positions. 
A/N:  Likely I don't own "One Piece" because I'm not even clever enough to avoid the most obvious topic for this topic.  Apologies.  Also, I crave Ace/Sanji right now in a way that's probably bad for me and this is the only way to fight my addiction.  Pity me.

“I gotta be on top,” Ace said apologetically, white teeth on display.  Those freckled cheeks didn’t redden a bit at his frankness. 

 

Sanji had heard that before.  And he was disappointed because Ace had seemed smarter.  But he supposed it didn’t matter.  He’d take it and know the whole time that he didn’t measure out his manliness based on positions.

 

Although frankly if Ace didn’t look so good without a shirt, Sanji would kick him in the head for being so dumb.

 

So Sanji snorted because it was stupid macho bullshit time yet again but he didn’t really care in the end as long as he got his end. 

 

Ace cocked his head to the side at the sound and looked like his brother for a moment before comprehension gave him back some brain cells.

 

“Hey, it’s not like that.  I like getting fucked.”  This time Sanji had to blush for Ace, who didn’t seem to know how.  Ace continued, “Smoker fucks me all the time.”

 

Sanji frowned.  Not because he was jealous but because if Ace liked to bottom then his insistence to top meant that he didn’t want Sanji to top and Sanji wasn’t having that, even if he was secure in his masculinity.

 

“Then what’s the fucking problem?”  Sanji asked, a fierce glower on his flushed face.

 

“Well, it’s harder to control my powers when I bottom.  It doesn’t matter with Smoker but…” Ace trailed off, shrugging sheepishly. 

 

Sanji thought of the implications of that and shuddered.

 

So when Ace reached for him and began stroking and teasing and whispering how good Sanji would feel on the inside because he was so hot on the outside, Sanji offered up no protests. 

After all, there was nothing manlier than wanting to protect your manliness from third-degree burns. 

  

Comments

[ptps.livejournal.com]

rofl hilarious XDD;; I can imagine them both combusting at the end of it hahaha XD

[morrigan-shadow.livejournal.com]

*Worried* That would be messy. I think Sanji should leave the combustion up to the expert and stick to just being delicious.

[ptps.livejournal.com]

"Ace!"
"Sanji!"
*BOOM*

[vampire-otaku.livejournal.com]

*sniggers* Yah, the punchline definately rocks. Whew. *tries to block out mental picture and fails, laughing*

[morrigan-shadow.livejournal.com]

Dude, try to live with that mental image in your head for three days. Just about turned me off gay pirate porn, I have to say. Thankfully I recovered.

[chibi-trillian.livejournal.com]

*snerk* Asbestos condom time! Bwa ha ha ha!

[morrigan-shadow.livejournal.com]

*Laughs* Oh, that's a really good idea! Also, secreticonloveattack!

[salmon-pink.livejournal.com]

Hah! I have no pity for you. Ace/Sanji will consume your soul and I shall watch and laugh.

I do have love for you though, because that was funny as hell.

[morrigan-shadow.livejournal.com]

*Pauses* You laugh an evil laugh of evil and I would love you less because of it if you hadn't just recced a freaking Barbie fic at my comm. Now I'm forced to love you like I love kittens and Korean horror movies. And that's a whole lot, buddy!

[salmon-pink.livejournal.com]

I excel at evil laughter. It's one of my many skills, along with the ability to consume an entire black forest gateau in a single sitting, and smacking into door-frames when entering a room, no matter how wide they are and how sober I may be.

Barbie is love, and that fic needs to be recced to high heaven. Even if it wasn't half as good as it is, I'd still rec it for being in the best fandom eva OMGWTFBBQ!!!!1!eleventyone!

I'm afraid that I am going to have to friend you now, and you shall be forced to put up with me stalking you. I feel another evil laugh coming on...

[chrysaliss.livejournal.com]

Mwhahahaha!!!! *wipe tears away* Is Smoker burn proof then?
It was so funny one anyway, I love it! ^__^

[morrigan-shadow.livejournal.com]

Thanks! I can only assume that Smoker is fire-proof because otherwise their completely canon sex life would suffer. And that would be sad.

[plotbunny-tiff.livejournal.com]

Oh man...that was just priceless. Loved everything about this!

[morrigan-shadow.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much! Your icon is killing me with all the movement and color. Lordy, it's mesmorizing.

[arelente2.livejournal.com]

oh dear....... im liking this

[morrigan-shadow.livejournal.com]

Thank you...and I love being called dear! Also, honey, baby, and muffincheeks.

[mango-32.livejournal.com]

I like Ace/Sanji too.XD

And I enjoyed this.*giggles*

[morrigan-shadow.livejournal.com]

I'm surprised it's not a more common pairing. I mean, Ace was practically crawling inside Sanji's robe during the Alabasta arc. Obvious much?

[cosmiko.livejournal.com]

I admit feeling somewhat lost until the last line. ^^; And then realisation hit, and I was laughing my head off. XD Clever idea, nicely written.

I've been seeking Ace/Sanji fanwork recently too. (A pity it doesn't seem too common a pairing relatively.) So, yours appeared at a good time. :D

[mishagirl.livejournal.com]

This was great!!