...

[mettathron.livejournal.com]

I think part of my soul died for writing this. It took four hours of wheedling, poking, whining, begging, attempted bribes, and Muse-cheering to get me to post it instead of sending it straight to my fic graveyard.

Title: Unfair
Word Count: 255
Topic: Porn
Rating: R
Pairing Zo/San
Disclaimer: They belong to Eiichiro Oda.




There are things the human body should not be able to do. No matter how finely honed a weapon, no matter how well crafted a tool; there are limits to strength and dexterity. Normal people should not be able to do to the things that Sanji and Zoro can do… but then again, neither the cook nor the swordsman are anything as banal as “normal”, and somehow they have the capacity to move beyond the boundaries of mortal limitations.

Still, it is unfair, Sanji thinks, that Zoro can deep throat him and still be able to smirk and sneer insults as clearly as if his mouth wasn’t full of the cook’s most sensitive bits. Especially when the damn marimo is teasing him so mercilessly that Sanji can’t do much more than stifle his incoherent moans of appreciation.

Later, when the cook finally has a chance to retaliate and show the swordsman just what kind of mind-blowing tricks he has up his own sleeve, Nami thinks that it really is unfair. Sanji is doing that thing with his tongue that threatens to melt Zoro’s brain into a puddle of bliss. They are a tableau of beauty and passion, a work of art comprised of deliciously taut muscles moving together, and they are hidden away from the world in the depths of the anchor deck.

So unfair, she decides as she loads another roll of film into her camera, that she simply must share it. Of course, such a glimpse of distilled desire does not come cheap…

Comments

[chibi-trillian.livejournal.com]

And it was worth every minute of begging and the whiplash-inducing shaking you're going to give me tomorrow. I looooove evil!Nami and ventriloquist!Zoro. ^___^

[fenm.livejournal.com]

Still, it is unfair, Sanji thinks, that Zoro can deep throat him and still be able to smirk and sneer insults as clearly as if his mouth wasn’t full of the cook’s most sensitive bits.

Man! I always forget about that. We need more talking-while-giving-head!Zoro... ^_^

[alita-b-angel.livejournal.com]

I second Fenm. Our swordsman has so many oral tricks! Zoro probably has enough room in his mouth for Sanji to fuck his mouth sideways. *goes boom*

Gogogo Nami. Grandline is an empty, sparkless place without your devotion to the sanctity of porn.

[morriwritestuff.livejournal.com]

They are a tableau of beauty and passion, a work of art comprised of deliciously taut muscles moving together, and they are hidden away from the world in the depths of the anchor deck.

I mean, Zoro insulting Sanji while giving him head is obviously awesome, but I think that that line is the very best. Smexy and descriptive!

And there should be even more Nami the Porn Producer fics in the world.

[kotszok.livejournal.com]

MWAHAHAHA OH YESSSS DELIGHTFUL. lol The end is priceless, oh nami you EVIL WENCH. ♥ Sanji and Zoro... mmmm.

[paxnirvana.livejournal.com]

Bwahahaha! Nami for the win!! No, they aren't human. But they are damn hot -- and the competitiveness just makes it even hotter. As wise Nami has already surmised (profitable too *smirk*).

[salmon-pink.livejournal.com]

Zoro can talk around cock. Sanji is all kinds of bendy. And Nami is the kind of industrious fangirl we all aspire to be. This is teh awesome!

[dethorats]

Nami's rationalization...XD Girl, you don't need an excuse.