This is arguably one of the most uneven contests since the Davy Back Fight.

[chibi-trillian.livejournal.com]

As mettathron keeps complaining that I'm encroaching on her Angst Master territory, we decided to have a fun little contest. We both wrote drabbles for the same pairing (Zoro/Sanji), the same genre (angst), and the same prompt (Promises, kindly provided by paxnirvana). As we couldn't work up the courage to ask find an impartial judge, we decided the community at large gets to judge. Most non-conversation comments wins.

I'm going to lose. WTF was I thinking? Eh, I had fun, and everybody gets a tasty Metta-drabble. XD

Title: The Ocean
Word Count: 253.
Rating: PG.
Pairing: Zoro/Sanji.
Topic: Off. I can't even stay on topic for my own week. XD


Your love is like the ocean you seek so desperately. It ebbs, it flows, it threatens to drown me sometimes. It tries to get into everything.

I can’t let you in. My heart is watertight, caulked with my promise to her and my own determination. The ocean of your love would rust and dull the blade of my soul, wash away my drive, leave me drifting and spent.

You storm and rage, but I am strong.

You use the undertow of your anger, the whirlpool of your hunger, the tsunamis of your desire to try to smash my heart open, but it holds.

You buffet me with your waves of lust and your winds of pleasure, but I stay afloat and carefully patch the leaks every time.

And now, you stand here with your ocean running down your face, slow and salty, hands clenched, begging me to let you in, goddammit, threatening to beat what you want and crave and need out of me.

Do you know what happens to a ship that lets the ocean in?

It sinks.

I cannot become the greatest from the bottom of your sea. And your love cannot accept that there are places it cannot go.

So I point my heart at the reefs of rage and coldness, grief and misunderstanding, and quickly, deliberately run it aground.

I let you strike me; spend some of your hurt before you leave me alone in a swirl of choked invective and rock-torn surf.

Blood like rust, tears like brine.

Comments

[ptps.livejournal.com]

Damn. TT I hate/love how Zoro seems so composed through all of this. It's like he's already rehearsed this so many times in his head.

And now, you stand here with your ocean running down your face, slow and salty, hands clenched, begging me to let you in, goddammit, threatening to beat what you want and crave and need out of me.

Do you know what happens to a ship that lets the ocean in?

It sinks.

*shot through the heart* Words dead on. T___T;;

[nike-victory.livejournal.com]

And now, you stand here with your ocean running down your face, slow and salty, hands clenched, begging me to let you in

Aw, damn, that line got to me. *sniffs*

[noodle6680.livejournal.com]

Nyaa, ocean love.

This was so angsty. I love it!!~~~

[kotszok.livejournal.com]

THIS IS NOT THE WAY TO START SUMMER VACATION. Please don't make me so depressed anymore. lol Lovely writing, the metaphors are crazy cool!

[geekchic07.livejournal.com]

How did I ever think reading such amazing angst stories would be a good idea?! Now I'm depressed. You're both far too skilled at sad making. Quickly, I need an anti-angst Zo/san now!


Also, along the lines of Jade's post, I can't possible decide between two such awesome examples of pure "/cry" in word-form. I think we need many, many more pieces to compare. ;)

[mango-32.livejournal.com]

I second ptps...these definitely strike home:
Do you know what happens to a ship that lets the ocean in?

It sinks."

D,damn..*heart clenches tight* I love your prose/poetry like style.

[anyjen.livejournal.com]

Zoro, you're so stupid! >_<

...sorry, I just had to say that. ^^U

This was beautiful, even if it makes me want to knock Zoro against a wall.

[hellagoddess.livejournal.com]

Amazing and incredible - so dead on it's astounding...