Going straight to hell for this.
Oct. 21st, 2006 09:13 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
ptps.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
onepieceyaoi100Title: 'Walls have Ears. And Eyes. And Everything, Really, Except Hands and the Necessary Pleasure-Producing Body Parts.' ........'Walls have Ears' is shorter and more innocuous-sounding.
Rating: PG-15 for implied Various.
Word Count: 298
Pairing: Guess. >>;
Topic: Senses (really vague.)
A/N:Bastardization of Spoilers for recent chapters, I guess.
“Honestly, you know. I feel… privilegedly degraded.”
“‘Priviledgedly’ isn’t really a word, Merry,” Chopper pointed out gently.
The figurehead sighed daintily, and rolled her painted eyes. “Really, Chopper, but isn’t there anything you could do about this? I mean, you ARE the doctor, you know. I’m pretty sure you have a list of long-suffering, painful, and possibly permanent diseases you could rattle off to scare them.”
“But that’s the thing.” Chopper sighed and looked slightly sad. “You can’t get any of them to believe that they’ll actually contract ailments like Scabies or Herpes or Gonorrhea. They’re characters in a manga. Stuff like that never happen to the shounen, and they know it.”
“That’s not fair,” Merry complained, “I’m suffering from wet rot and termites! And severe damage in general. I’ve gotten decapitated before. And my mast broken. Not to mention having several holes blown and-slash-or eaten from my sides. And I have mysterious stains in nearly everyplace imaginable – they could have left the riggings alone, but NO – AND they always dry up by morning so no one ever notices. Oh, the trauma.”
“B-but you get to see all the sekrit hawt boy sex scenes that never got aired!” Chopper protested, “and most of the stuff that the fandom puts out barely comes close to the real thing. Like how Sanji actually really tops Zoro more because he can screw harder. Hips and legs and all. And that Usopp’s really the one behind the doujinshi business, not Nami. She’s always too busy being with Robin.”
“True.” It was Merry’s turn to sigh, albeit blissfully, and she turned a little pink. “My existence has been justified.”
“Hate to spoil you, but you die in 430.”
“It’s alright.” Merry’s lips quirked up into a perverse Robin-esque smile. “I was really happy.”
A/N: STRAIGHT TO HELL. *dies*
Rating: PG-15 for implied Various.
Word Count: 298
Pairing: Guess. >>;
Topic: Senses (really vague.)
A/N:
“Honestly, you know. I feel… privilegedly degraded.”
“‘Priviledgedly’ isn’t really a word, Merry,” Chopper pointed out gently.
The figurehead sighed daintily, and rolled her painted eyes. “Really, Chopper, but isn’t there anything you could do about this? I mean, you ARE the doctor, you know. I’m pretty sure you have a list of long-suffering, painful, and possibly permanent diseases you could rattle off to scare them.”
“But that’s the thing.” Chopper sighed and looked slightly sad. “You can’t get any of them to believe that they’ll actually contract ailments like Scabies or Herpes or Gonorrhea. They’re characters in a manga. Stuff like that never happen to the shounen, and they know it.”
“That’s not fair,” Merry complained, “I’m suffering from wet rot and termites! And severe damage in general. I’ve gotten decapitated before. And my mast broken. Not to mention having several holes blown and-slash-or eaten from my sides. And I have mysterious stains in nearly everyplace imaginable – they could have left the riggings alone, but NO – AND they always dry up by morning so no one ever notices. Oh, the trauma.”
“B-but you get to see all the sekrit hawt boy sex scenes that never got aired!” Chopper protested, “and most of the stuff that the fandom puts out barely comes close to the real thing. Like how Sanji actually really tops Zoro more because he can screw harder. Hips and legs and all. And that Usopp’s really the one behind the doujinshi business, not Nami. She’s always too busy being with Robin.”
“True.” It was Merry’s turn to sigh, albeit blissfully, and she turned a little pink. “My existence has been justified.”
“Hate to spoil you, but you die in 430.”
“It’s alright.” Merry’s lips quirked up into a perverse Robin-esque smile. “I was really happy.”
A/N: STRAIGHT TO HELL. *dies*
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no subject
Date: 2006-10-21 01:51 am (UTC)Poor Merry. At least she got to cross over with all of the happiness that the constant nakama orgy can bring... *is shot*
no subject
Date: 2006-10-21 01:16 pm (UTC)<Usopp> I hate fish. It gives me hives, and herpes!
no subject
Date: 2006-10-21 07:07 pm (UTC)And this bit?
“B-but you get to see all the sekrit hawt boy sex scenes that never got aired!” Chopper protested, “and most of the stuff that the fandom puts out barely comes close to the real thing. Like how Sanji actually really tops Zoro more because he can screw harder. Hips and legs and all. And that Usopp’s really the one behind the doujinshi business, not Nami. She’s always too busy being with Robin.”
You do not go to hell. You go to YaoiHeaven, where all the beautiful and talented writers go and indulge in the wonders of slash fiction...
*sigh* I wanna go there, but thanks to you I have seen a glimpse into this wonderful place where you have ascended. X3
no subject
Date: 2006-10-24 08:55 pm (UTC)Also...Merry smiling in a perverse Robin way...I think some ship's been watching a little TOO much.
no subject
Date: 2006-10-26 02:49 am (UTC)BEST LINE EVER. EVER. EVER.